transitional swirlings and twirlings; part 5

 

It’s been awhile since I updated on overall status. Being as I got fired the Thursday preceding Memorial Day weekend, and here it is Labor Day, and things finally seem like they have a shape. A shape I don’t hate. Truth is, I’m still transitioning (and of course, when won’t I be?) but I feel less swirly.

Here is a brief recap of my summer.

Part 1 — Fired. Orien Rose’s accident. I’d met a boy who actually called. (I got him gone by Part 2.)

Part 2 — Dreaming of life beyond the corporate. I start bringing my music to the world, and the world starts to find me.

Part 3 — Manson Family Follies performance, plans to record all kinds of demos, heading off to Free Spirit.

Part 4 — Baby steps. A lot of them. With all kinds of nothing in between. Orien Rose is on the mend and preparing for Starwood. Joe and I have been speaking often and have seen each other twice.

And that was mid-July.

Since that time there has been overwhelming fear around money and jobs. Well, there has been virtually no money, and a whole lotta little when it comes to job interviews and opportunity. And just lots of stalls. I get promised gigs but I can’t make them actually happen. I get a CD label designed for some live originals but I can’t get my hands on the file. I got the voiceovers made and I took a marketing class but I need the packaging to really move forward, and I’m still waiting for those. I’m jazzed up about perhaps teaching music classes for children but I don’t have the money for the training and it’s not really the kind of thing I can do if I am back at a full-time job, so how can I justify the investment?

And things finally start shaking loose in the last month. Joe and I start sleeping together. I start playing a lot more open mics/jams. I get a freelance, temp-to-perm assignment. The day I start there, more phone calls start coming, including one of the musical gigs I’ve been trying to book all summer.

(Because of how my name is at the top of this blog, I’ve never really written about that freelance assignment. And I won’t. But I don’t breathe well there, to say the least.)

Then last week the skies burst open again, with two great interviews and a more exciting temp-to-perm freelance assignment.

I start tomorrow. Right near Grand Central Station. I am committed for two weeks, and it could go on for quite awhile, (implicit in the ‘temp-to-perm’ descriptor). In the meantime there was the other interview from last week (the lovefest), which I expect to hear about in a day or so.

So for now… I’m out of immediatest danger.

This summer has brought shifts in many areas. I’ve been involved in a lot of magical workings and circlings. My sister and I are in the best place we’ve been in a decade. Joe and I… think what you want, but having that love in my life keeps me more emotionally fluid; he is an anti-coagulant. (How is that for the most unromantic metaphor ever!) And through all of this I am weaving, slowly, the threads of a better life. Demos have been recorded. Music is being performed. Spells have been cast.

I could do a ‘just in case it sounds too dreamy, here’s everything that’s still wrong’ paragraph. There is plenty, but…

… naaah.