So here I am on vacation. I still have the core problem of being couchbound. I don’t get out of the house easily, and I don’t get the stuff done around my apartment that I want to get done. My apartment is just—well, it’s one me away from being beautiful. And today I wanted to get into the city and just enjoy the beautiful day, and that resulted in my leaving the apartment around 4pm.
ahh me— I am a conundrum.
I’ve been definitely enjoying myself—my goal was to immerse myself in fun and activities so as to create that sense of being away on vacation. I think I’m starting to achieve that. Last Friday, my last day at work, seems like a lifetime ago. There was a work happy hour and then I went to Marie’s. On Saturday I attended our midsummer ritual. It was lovely to be in the space and see all those folks.
Sunday was my first pride parade. I went in and met up with the girls—it was like a gajillion degrees out and my most macho move was stopping for coffee—that’s right, hot coffee. I saw maybe 45 minutes of the parade. It was surprisingly moving. Just—I could go on, at length, of how amazing it is to see how far we have come. There is a lot of forward to get to, but I am old enough to have witnessed a different world. And I found this parade to be majestic. And I was proud.
Which brings me to my next topic. Let’s jump ahead to the following night, where I am telling Bert about my day at the parade. Afterward we all went to a big party at a big dyke bar. (The dykes were not especially big, but the bar was. A huge outdoor space kind of thing.) I was mostly bored and out of sorts. I’m telling him, just as I’m telling you, that, to be fair, I’ve never enjoyed that kind of bar scene. Loud music, lots of drinking, hundreds of people. Not my thing. I’m talking here and there with my each of my friends, but they are flitting about. And okay plus how it was still a gajillion degrees. But at some point I finally notice that what is probably more stimulating for all of my friends is that there are lots of women around—gay women. And that was probably pretty awesome for all of them. Me? It kind of didn’t register. Except that there were no men around. “So”, I say to Bert, “not that I needed to, but I reaffirmed that I am not gay”.
He just laughs and says, “You are so not gay. “ Read the rest of this entry »